davehayes.org

about 10 or so in the morning, as i was happily working away in my office, our internet connection ceased to exist. being that i am the network administrator, responsible for a few servers and about 50 users who rely heavily upon email and internet-based ordering systems, this is a Very Bad Thing. upon further inspection, i discover that our phone service (and therefore fax) is also inoperable. so what’s going on? the weather is nice… no rain or lightning to cause outages… what could it be?

a semi truck, that’s what.

apparently, this guy tried to pull alongside our building and the cable that carries our telecom services snagged on his trailer. he kept driving and ripped the cable off of the pole. as you can see, jay was not happy about this.

i stepped back inside and decided to take a peek in our server closet, where all the telecom schmegma comes into the building. what do i find? i find our box darn near ripped out of the wall!

this following the bursted water mane and sink hole in our parking lot about a week prior was nothing short of amazing. see the rest of the pictures here.

WARNING: due to some sweeping changes to compiz, this howto is now badly out of date. i’m going to be working on a new (much better) version targeted for edgy eft. until then, please head on over to compiz.net for help.

this howto assumes that you already have 3d acceleration working properly on an up-to-date i386 ubuntu dapper system. this howto only covers the steps necessary to install and configure xgl and compiz. if you need help with anything else, please visit ubuntu forums.

if you’re having trouble viewing the video, you can download the xvid version.

the video above is what we’re trying to accomplish with this howto. this amazing desktop interface is accomplished with xgl and compiz. please take a moment to read the wikipedia articles on xgl and compiz before getting started.

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a little while back, i went with a friend (unfortunately a fat, bald dude and not some cute blonde) to see the new mission: impossible (aka :m:i:3::::::). now, i know in the past girls went ga ga over tom cruise. he’s supposedly a very handsome man (i’m not qualified to make such judgements), and i’m sure at least one of the two girls that read this blog (not you, mom) are probably drooling over the picture right there. go ahead and click on it for the super-zoom-cruise-view and rejoin the group as soon as you’re finished.

well, i can’t stand to look at this guy (and not just because he’s a complete moonbat). you see, while i was at the movie i noticed something: dude’s face is crooked. most peoples’ gap between their two front teeth is centered below their nose but tom cruise’s gap is not centered. one of his teeth is and man does it look weird. just look at it there on the left. i blew it up so you could see it. the movie itself was surprisingly not completely awful but man does this guy’s face bug the crap out of me. you know i’m right, go ahead and click the other picture again and see for yourself. on another somewhat related note, have you ever noticed the way john mayer sticks his tongue out when he sings?

1. The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
2. Passed out, surrounded by terrorists and nerve gas, and handcuffed to a table leg, Jack Bauer laughed to himself and said, “I have them right where I want them.”
3. If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he’d shoot Nina twice.
4. If Jack Bauer’s gun jams, it’s because he wanted to beat you with it.
5. Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a “knock knock” joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the goddamned bomb was.
6. If everyone on “24″ followed Jack Bauer’s instructions, it would be called “12″.
7. Jack Bauers calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
8. Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
9. A standard deck now contains 48 cards. Too many people were getting hurt for trying to play Jack.
10. Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
11. If you wake up in the morning, it’s because Jack Bauer spared your life.
12. There have been no terrorist attacks in United States since Jack Bauer has appeared on television.
13. If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it’s f***ing beef.
14. 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
15. When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer f***ing hates lemonade.
16. Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
17. When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.
18. The state of California plans to reduce violent crime by changing the method of capital punishment from lethal injection to Jack Bauer.
19. Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
20. Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
21. RIP Edgar If you see this give it a 10. Just cuz it’s what Edgar would have wanted.
22. Jack Bauer set an ordinary flash memory card to self-destruct. Don’t ask how he did it, he’s f***ing Jack Bauer.
23. Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
24. Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
25. Jack Bauer sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

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